Monday, November 24, 2014

HAPPY AND SINGLE

I am a 24 year old, college graduate, LDS girl, living in Salt Lake City Utah and... I'm single.
Knowing that, I'm sure you won't be surprised to hear that the most common questions I am asked are... 
Who are you dating? Why aren't you dating? Why aren't you married? Do you want to get married? Why are you single? and my personal favorite... You are so great! Why don't you have a boyfriend? 
I am not quite sure why, but for some reason being 20-something years old and unmarried gets people quite concerned for your well-being.  Now before I continue I need to make something quite clear. There is nothing wrong with dating or being married. I can't wait for the day when I find the right guy and can be with him forever. But as much as I can't wait to find him, I don't plan to sit around simply waiting either. 
Being 24 and single has allowed me some time to ponder, grow and dare I even say mature. I have realized things that my younger self never would have learned if my life had gone according to MY plans. 
Realization #1: PLANS CHANGE  
I never planned on being the last of my friends to get married. I never planned on being 24 and still single. HOWEVER... I also never planned on being a photographer. I never planned on owning a magazine. I never planned on being the Youth Advocate at a high school working with the greatest kids known to man. Many of my plans have changed over the years and I have learned that HIS plan is better than MY plan. God knows you. He is aware of you. You have not been forgotten. He hears your prayers, just trust in his timing. 
Realization #2: THERE IS MORE TO LIFE 
I am in no way discounting marriage. I can assure you I am just as excited about my wedding day as the next girl. HOWEVER... Finding the "man of my dreams" and getting married is not my end-all-ultimate goal. There is so much more to life than just getting married. We shouldn't be waiting on finding our significant other in order to enjoy our lives and become who we were meant to become. 
Realization #3: OTHER RELATIONSHIPS MATTER 
Yes, I am still single, and yes, I still live at home, and no I am not just "mooching off my parents". I actually simply really enjoy being with my family. I know that if I had gotten married when I had planned on getting married, the relationship I have with my parents and siblings would be very different. I have gotten so close with my family because I chose to live at home. I have been able to develop those relationships into something truly incredible. I think people often get so focused on finding "the one" that they forget to treasure the relationships with those who have been there since "day one".   
Realization #4: YOU CAN BE GREAT AND SINGLE
"You are so great! Why don't you have a boyfriend?" My very favorite question. It implies that being great must mean you are in a relationship. So on the flip side, if you're not in a relationship, you must not be very great. Since when did "greatness" (or lack thereof) qualify anyone for a relationship. I'm sure we all know many people who are "taken" who might not actually be that great... as well as many incredible people who are single as can be. Truth is, you CAN be great and single.   
Along with being great, you really can and even should be HAPPY and single. Don't wait around for your Prince (or Princess) Charming to come and sweep you off your feet before choosing to be happy. That only leads to a lot of wasted life and wasted happiness. Live your life now. Your time will come. Until then, choose to be happy and single. 


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